A Conversation with my Husband BEFORE KIDS

• Hey You

Hey.

• What's UP?

Nothing... want to meet for lunch?

• Sure... where? 

Don't know you pick.. .I don't want to think.

• OK meet at Eddie's Place.

See you there.

******** meanwhile at lunch.....

• What are we doing tonight? Want to go to a movie?

Sure

• OK You PICK... because I picked last time. 

OK.

• So what's up at work? How's the big job going?  Really he did? Wow...... blah blah blah.

A lot of nonsense chatter that I always loved because I have always been "into my husband's day".  No I am not consumed by it but I have an interest in his career too.  May sound weird but it's warpiness.  I also ask him just about every day what he ate for lunch....not because I want to drool over what he may have had or because I am jealous that he got to go out and I more than likely did not but because I care about what he ate and just want to know.  YES AGAIN -- Warpiness. 

So you think I am totally into all his business?  NOPE.  This is coming from a wife who has NEVER ONCE gone through his wallet or his briefcase in 20 years.  Heck I never did that when we were dating.  (Yes I think I am one of a few that can honestly admit it).  If he tells me to get something out of his wallet I usually don't especially  if he is in a position where I can can just toss it over and let him do the work.  I have no desire or need to go though his stuff.  I am not looking for anything and guess there is a part of me that feels so totally comfortable that nothing is there.  Maybe a bad feeling to have?  I don't think so.  I am married to the type person that is kind of like a SAINT ON EARTH.  He will not like reading that but it has so much truth to it on many levels (all very level levels -- no tilt to them at all).  Raised so properly by two incredible people he is as grounded as they come.  I am the EXACT opposite.  I can be talked into anything at just about any time.  Yep.. that's me... your 'portable party'.  I know life is not always a party but it is my often annoying bubbly happy-go-lucky you can try to piss me off attitude rearing it's cute little head (not stating I am cute here just a matter or word usage) that makes me a person who should be more responsible but am not.   

So our life AS WE KNEW IT changed overnight.  The process took right at a year so yes we had time to plan but it was such a different type of planning.  It's not like we had the pregnancy to go along with it.  We were PAPER PREGNANT and knew no delivery date.  Now that was weird.  What was even weirder is that for adoption number 1 we got the news on a Tuesday left on a Friday and were back 9 days later.  Now that delivery was pretty darn quick (after our pink slip was issued).    My second birth was not so fast.  She was going to take her own time and do it to her own beat.  Lil' Miss Maran made us travel for miles and it was, I might add, the biggest trip from HE*L ever.  SO WORTH IT AFTER THE FACT but a total crappy trip that would make a great life time movie one day.  To this day I really could still do without Chinese food and we have been home for over 90 days. Back to Child 1...ssuddenly two married people (for sixteen years) who had just turned 40 were getting a 10 month old child and reality could not have hit harder.  Talk about SPOILED -- YES US...no not the kid (well that comes later).  It was a difficult adjustment to say the least.

I was so afraid that my local watering holes were going to go out of business.  So scared that the places that 'knew my name' would no longer know me.  Fearful that my life was over I couldn't imagine having a child or two and still getting to do anything because you don't have children and get to do stuff right?  See the selfishness coming out here?  My friends never got to do anything.  They sat home and stared at each other and talked about the newest model of baby puke.  (Puke does change in color, size, texture and smell I am told).  I will not put a severe jinx on ourselves by going into detail here about baby puke for fear that our one child WHO HAS NEVER PUKED, YAKED or HURLED with us will start doing so). So this conversation will not take place frequently.  But I can promise you one thing....the first time said un-puken child does puke.... the ENTIRE world will stop for the moments that it is occurring.  Said child will COMPLETELY and totally flip out and never know  how said child's body could do such a thing.  I don't even know if said child has even seen anyone else puke... well except for me on one really bad late evening... OK JUST KIDDING.  Uhm... not sure am I?  I am going to say yes.

Adjustment came with it's harshness.  More to follow on that..............